Worst To First: The Films Of John Carpenter

So I figured it might be fun to list a director's films from their worst outing to their best. Because, hey, why not. And everybody loves lists. The first person will be John Carpenter, who has directed one of the worst films I have ever watched and possibly one of the five best. So there's some range here. Also, I didn't include The Ward because I never saw it. But based on popular reaction, it'd be near the bottom.

17. Vampire$ (1998): Possibly the worst movie I ever paid to watch. And that includes Cyborg.

16. Ghosts of Mars (2001): Stupidity on a grand scale.

15. Escape from L.A. (1996): Worst CGI surfing scene ever until Die Another Day gave us Bond hanging ten.

14. Memoirs of an Invisible Man (1992): Chevy Chase on the downslope of his career. I want my 99 minutes back!!

13. Christine (1983): Uninspired is the best thing I can say about it.

12. Village of the Damned (1995): Almost beat out Christine, but just had enough going for it to rank here.

11. Dark Star (1974): This may be an unfair placement. I have admittedly not seen this in a while. I remember laughing at some points and being bored to tears in others.

10. Starman (1984): Overlooked. Not a bad film at all.

9. Prince of Darkness (1987): This film wanders all over the place at times. But I love the concept and it has some genuinely scary shit in it.

8. Big Trouble in Little China (1986): You either love this film or hate it. If you hate it, we can never be friends. Sorry. And Jack Burton kicks ass. It's all in the reflexes.

7. The Fog (1980): Great atmosphere, some of the best you'll ever see in a horror film.

6. They Live (1988): Guilty pleasure. But how can you not love this film? B-Movie pulp at it's finest.

5. In the Mouth of Madness (1995): 2/3 awesome, 1/3 stumble. But those 2/3...amazing work.

4. Escape From New York (1981): I say this film still holds up today. Awesome adventure flick.

3. Assault on Precinct 13 (1976): Homage to Rio Bravo. Better than it's remake. Possibly the best adventure flick of the 70s.

2. Halloween (1978): Pinnacle of slasher horror. Still effective 30 years later. Rob Zombie should be castrated for his shit remake.

1. The Thing (1982): Only film to get the Lovecraftian sense of horror and dread right from beginning to end. Never lets you go. No happy endings here...and that's how it should be.