Let's Talk About Beer: Evil Twin - Bikini Beer

I have written before about a man's quest for a good light beer and the horrendous pitfalls one encounters along the way. At best, the light beer is inoffensive. At worst, I believe the phrasing I used was "hydrochloric acid spiked with urine".

So. Is it possible for a stout fellow to find a good beer that doesn't pack on the calories?

Yes. Yes it is. And it is all thanks to the mad genius at Evil Twin Brewing, Jeppe Jarnit-Bjergsø.

Bikini Beer is a light IPA. That, in and of itself, it pretty amazing. The overwhelming amount of light beers on the market are lagers. To have a light IPA is a rare thing indeed.

Now, I dont want to oversell the hopiness of the beer. It is a light beer, after all. It is as if they have dialed back the hops of your standard IPA about 50%. Definitely still there, but more like it is saying "hey" as opposed to smacking you in the face.

Frankly, it can do double-duty as a session IPA. It's a got a nice citrus-y zing to it and at 2.7% ABV you can drink it all day if you are so inclined. Especially when it is warm. It's a perfect summer beer.

And if you are looking to shed a few pounds in your middle-age, as I am, it's only 81 calories.

Yes, you read that right. 81 calories. 30 calories less than Bud Light. 15 less than Miller Lite. And about 100x more taste than both.

Really, the only possible drawback to this beer is if you are a guy who is somehow threatened by being seen drinking an IPA called Bikini Beer. If you are, then not only are you a fool, but you are missing out on what may be the best light beer today.

Find it. Drink it.

------------------

Beer: Evil Twin Bikini Beer

ABV: 2.7%

Style: American IPA / Light

Price: Between $10 - $13 for a six-pack

Recommendation: Strong Buy

Let's Talk About Beer: Evil Twin - Fire Water

I have a few loves in my life. First and foremost my family. But a close second and third are beer and spicy hot food. And at least those two don't hide my car keys after they finish eating dinner in their high-chair.

Most times when it comes to beer and that kind of heat, if you are enjoying them both it is as two separate elements. Beer and BBQ. Beer and hot wings. Beer and some crazy-ass Thai dish that feels like it's burning a hole right through your tongue.

But sometimes the most enjoyable way to consume beer and heat is as a cohesive, single beverage. One of my favorites was the Stone 11.11.11 Vertical Epic Ale which used anaheim chiles and cinnamon. Now anaheim chiles are not all that hot, so the 11.11.11 was mild but quite enjoyable. On the other end, also from Stone, was Punishment. The heat in that was akin to a nuclear blast and such that you needed another beer at the same time to quell the heat.

I don't find that quite as enjoyable. With beer, the only thing I enjoy in an "overpowering" fashion is hops. When you allow outside flavors to completely take over a beer, I feel like you lose part of what makes beer so enjoyable. The real trick with heat (or anything extra) when it comes to beer is to have one complement the other. That goes for fruit, bourbon barrel aging, whatever.

Which brings me to Evil Twin Brewery and their new release called Fire Water. If you aren't familiar with Evil Twin, it's a gypsy brewery started in Copenhagen, Denmark by Jeppe Jarnit-Bjergsø, who has since moved to Brooklyn. If the name Bjergsø sounds familiar, it's because Jeppe has a twin brother Mikkel. Mikkel Borg Bjergso runs Mikkeller. Oh, and because they hate one another.

Fire Water is a pale ale that has had jalapeno peppers added. Now, that may sound intimidating to some but you have to remember that the jalapeno isn't that much hotter than the anaheim chili. So you aren't talking about tear-inducing heat with this beer.

The first taste is that of any finely-crafted pale ale. And then the jalapeno hits. But it's interesting; the jalapeno gives you a hint of sweetness at first. That tails into a heat that isn't overwhelming at all. It lingers on the back of your tongue and while you notice it, it is not an unpleasant sensation. Even as it builds over drinking the bottle, it never reaches a point where it becomes uncomfortable.

Jeppe has really found the right balance with Fire Water. You notice the heat, but it never overwhelms the beer or the experience of drinking the beer. Which is the problem I had with Punishment. This is a good beer to drink while relaxing in the shade on a summer's day or while eating a burger. Or just because you like good beer.

Fire Water is a limited release. So if you can find it, buy it.

------------------

Beer: Evil Twin Fire Water

ABV: 5.5%

Style: Pale Ale / Chile

Price: Between $10 - $12 for a 22 oz. bottle

Recommendation: Strong Buy

This Is What You Give People When You Wish They Were Dead

I am blessed to live in a part of these United States where the craft beer movement is deep and strong. Within a 15-mile radius of where I live I can access some of the best beer being made in the US, if not the world. And we have the specialty dealers who can get us the beer from further away.

I am less blessed in having a physique that rivals Pablo Sandoval's, but without the innate ability to hit a baseball for millions of dollars a year. And as I move firmly into middle-age, it's become apparent that has to change.

I could stop drinking beer. But let's be honest, that's insane. There's a reason it's one of the oldest beverages created by Man. Not drinking beer is going against a biological imperative passed down through the ages.

So you have to find the right beer to drink. A good one you can find in stores is Founders All Day IPA. It's not a light beer, but it is lower in calories than most other craft beers. There is a style of beer called Berliner weisse that is pretty low-calorie. It's tart but light (a German sour to be precise), definitely a warmer-weather beer. This is much harder to find but there are a few breweries in the US (New Glarus in Wisconsin, Bear Republic and The Bruery in CA among others) making this beer.

Then there are the mass-produced stand-byes. If you grew up in the 70s and your dad drank beer (told you I was middle-aged), then Miller Lite is a part of your childhood memories. If you want to go foreign, then Kirin Light is actually pretty-damned tasty. You can drink these and still be satisfied, even if it is not up to the quality of a craft light beer.

And then there are the evil beers.

Let's be clear - I am not talking about Keystone or the Beast here. Those beers never pretend to be more than they are; cheap alternatives for broke college students. You can't hate on a product that is honest about what it is.

Let's Talk About Beer: Harpoon 100 Barrel Series - Saison Various (Session 47)

I will admit at the outset that I am favorably inclined towards Harpoon and their products. When I finished college I moved to Boston in the mid-90s. And one of the highlights of my first couple of years there was St. Patrick's Day. And while that day usually ended early the next day with me in some state of disrepair, it would begin at the Harpoon Brewery. It was always a great time. How great? I still own this.

That's 1996 if you can't read the date on it. This glass has followed me around for almost 20 years. Which is impressive or sad depending on your point of view. Let's go with impressive.

All of this is a long way of saying that Harpoon always holds a positive position in my mind and that may bias me a little. So keep that in mind.

Anyway, I was in the package store the other day and saw a new Harpoon beer. They are doing a 100 Barrel series and this was number 47, called "Saison Various". Essentially, it is a blend of four different Saisons from four Harpoon brewers. The four are defined as such:

1. A traditional farmhouse Saison brewed without spices
2. A Saison made with East Kent Goldings hops, coriander and white peppercorns
3. A Saison made with American hops and a Trappist yeast
4. A Saison with a citrusy hop profile

So now here is where people usually get all fancy and talk about the mouth of the beer or it's body and they try to sound like wine connoisseurs. And that just isn't me. I'll tell you if it's good or not.

And it is good...but not great. The problem I have with a blended beer is the same I have with a blended Scotch. What makes a great beer great, or a great Scotch great, is that it says something about itself when you drink it. You can taste what makes it special, the time it took to make it. And that doesn't happen with a blend. Everything gets a little...muddled.

So it is with this Saison Various. You do catch the coriander and the peppercorns at the start but they are overtaken by the Trappist yeast and citrusy hops cancelling each other out. The flavor profiles don't mesh as well as you'd like them to. So what you're left with is a beer that you can tell is of good quality but really doesn't make any kind of statement. It's a Saison that can't decide what kind of Saison it wants to be.

I'd much prefer to taste each of these separately and compare the concepts that each brewer brought to the table. Especially the Trappist one - that could be something special or a complete trainwreck.

So is it worth buying? If you want to give it a whirl it's not too expensive - I bought the 22oz bottle for 6.99. And it's not a bad beer by any means. It's just confused.

------------------

Beer: Harpoon 100 Barrel Series - Saison Various (Session 47)

ABV: 6.1%

IBU: 34

Price: $6.99

Recommendation: Weak Buy